How to Connect and Motivate More People to Listen

Posted on by in Communication, Leadership, Marketing, Relationships

Do you ever feel, when writing a letter or giving a speech, that you’re just not connecting well to most of the people in your audience? Or ever feel stuck when trying to write copy for a sales letter? If you have, I’ve got some great advice that will make any of those situations infinitely better.

I was listening to a free audio segment by Eben Pagan as he was promoting his new product launch. During that interview, another internet marketer, Frank Kern, asked him to share one of the best ideas from his new product. To which Eben said something like, “Sure, it’s the idea of using frameworks when structuring a letter or having a conversation.”

He then went on to say that he got this first framework from David Kolb of Harvard and it’s related to the four different learning styles people have. However, before he shared the four styles, he made two comments that I think are incredibly valuable and worth remembering.

1. Most people tend to teach (or write or communicate) based on their primary style (i.e. they make the cardinal mistake of believing that how they learn is how everyone else likes to learn)

2. Which means that most people aren’t effectively communicating with the majority of people when they teach (or write or communicate) since they’re not using all four styles.

Both of those insights are dead on! He then went on to share the four different learning styles

Effective_communication 1. The Why learning style – This kind of person needs to be motivated to learn

2. The What learning style – This kind of person likes to hear
content, theories, systems, history, etc.

3. The How learning style – This kind of person wants to hear the
practical steps of how to actually do the thing.

4. The What If learning style – This kind of person needs to know how to make this happen RICHT NOW and what the implications of that will be.

That’s brilliant! It’s such a simple outline and easy framework to use. For example, using this very subject, you’ve already seen the “WHY”. The intro asked you a couple of questions, plus the two points about communicating in your own style means that you’re not connecting with most people if you don’t use these four styles.

The WHAT, was the content related to David Kolb and the four learning styles. I’m a WHAT learner and you can see that clearly, for example, after relating the four styles I said, “That’s brilliant.”

However, we haven’t gotten to the HOW yet so some of you aren’t happy yet. The solution is to offer some practical how to’s. For example, I could say, “If you want to increase your ability to connect with all four styles, before you write a single word of your letter, speech or sales copy, write out these four words at the top of your paper, ‘Why? What? How? and What if?’ Then, answer them. Never ever communicate with a group of people without answering all four questions.”

Finally, for the WHAT IF people, I might say, “What I want you to do RIGHT NOW, before you move on to the next thing on your to do list is to make a list of the people you work with and what you think their primary learning style is. Then, the next time you talk with them today, communicate in that style and see what happens. Don’t wait until you have to write a letter or give a speech. Do it right now! And watch the difference.”

In other words, by covering all four styles, you’ll automatically increase the percentage of people who will actually hear what you’re saying in the way that they want to hear it. What a radical idea! So go do it NOW!

To your accelerated growth!

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